I have still been thinking about what I wrote and there a some things I would like to add, some things that I should have put in there yesterday because they are important.
My seven-year-old daughter watches me. She watches me make healthy choices by working out and preparing balanced meals and she watches me make choices that may not be viewed as healthy or the right choice by having ice cream or a hot dog. My daughter watches me. All the time. The last thing that I want to instill in her is that she is not healthy that she is not good enough, if she does not workout every day, or she eats more than chicken and quinoa for dinner. I want this sweet girl to realize that she is good enough and that as long as she is consistently making the right choices it is okay for her to have days that are less than perfect. It is okay if she is not rail thin and you can see every move her muscles make. I want her to realize that she is good enough, that she is perfect.
I do not want my daughter see me eat at a different fast food place because the place that the majority chose is "unhealthy", I do not want her to see me eating a meal that I packed while everyone else is eating the food that was prepared for them at the barbecue. I want her to see someone who is doing her best to be healthy, but also allows herself moments of indulgence. I do not want my daughter to think that her body needs to look a certain way, because let's be honest here, getting to that point of extreme 'fitness' is a challenge, and remaining at that level is even more of a challenge.
My eight-year-old son watches me. He watches me make healthy choices and he watches me make 'unhealthy' choices. My son watches me. All the time. I do not want him to see a woman who is constantly obsessing over what she eats or missing a workout. I do not want this impressionable young boy see a woman who cannot let go and enjoy the little things in life; eating an ice cream cone with her children or having a few beers with her husband, or *gasp* eating more than one slice of pizza on a Friday night. I want this boy to see this because I do not want his expectations of women to be distorted and unrealistic.
I do want both of my children to see a Momma who cares about her body and how she takes care of it, I want them to see a Momma who does her best to make healthy choices for her family, but I also want them to see a Momma who indulges in the good things that life has to offer. I want them to know that sometimes I may be too tired to get up early and workout, so I sleep because that is what my body needed. I want them to see a Momma who misses a workout because she is sick and just cannot push through that day, or she misses a workout because they are sick and need her the entire day. I want them to see a Momma who has some balance and is not consumed by the 'way of life' she has chosen.
I said it in my previous post, I used to be that girl. I ran like a crazy woman six to seven days a week. I was very careful about the things I ate. I was also very quick to feel guilty when I 'messed up'. I used to be that girl and I am so glad that I was her back before my kids and before my husband. I am enough without being obsessed with being 'better'. I do what I can to stay on top of my health, but life sometimes gets in the way and I let it.